Fish or Cut Bait Relationship Evaluation

There comes a time in any dating situation where you have to decide whether to go to the next stage or the next relationship. Going to the next relationship is exciting and can re-create the fun early days of getting to know someone. But if you're not careful, you may find yourself doing only dessert and never the meal, because in dating the dessert part comes first. If you're looking exclusively for excitement, it always makes sense to move on. If you're looking for intimacy and even...

Dont sweat it

You know, the thing that really separates men from women. Men love the Three Stooges women just don't get it. A few weeks ago I was loading my sweaty 'tards into a laundry bag at the gym when a cute fella walked by and started to chat with me. I cautioned him that he was standing dangerously close to the rather ripe scent of my exercise gear. He got a dreamy look on his face and said, Yeah, smells like sweat, baby, baby. Like I said, a difference between men and...

Sidestepping emotional pitfalls

It's certainly okay and appropriate to ask yourself whether you can live with your decision over time. But be aware of the emotional seductions that are part and parcel of this experience they go directly for the gut or the jugular and completely ignore that grown-up, smart part of you. Music is as old as human history and is part of each of our personal histories. Lullabies your mom sang you the first time you heard the Star Spangled Banner or Yesterday or Heaven Help Us or Feelings singing...

Sexual viability

One of the major drawbacks of large age differences deals with the age-old problem of childbearing years. An older woman who is through childbearing with a younger man who decides he wants children is going to create chaos, as is a younger woman who wants children with an older man who doesn't. Tradition, tradition I do (and I don't) The divorce rate has remained steady at around 40 percent (the 50 percent statistic was a computational error that was admitted in 2005 because it divided the...

Small talk

Small talk has gotten a bum rap (excuse the pun). Mistakenly linked with air-headedness, the assumption is that those who engage in small talk only chitchat about life's piddling moments without a concern for the deeper, burning issues underneath. Poppycock. Small talk is a necessary and important part of our social fabric. It's a way to adjust to one another, get comfortable, and find your conversational seat. Without small talk, we'd all be walking up to acquaintances and saying, Hi. How...

Keeping a Dating Notebook

Throughout this book, I include exercises you can do to find out more about yourself and what you want, as well as suggestions for noting your feelings and impressions. Treat this as both an opportunity and a project to find out more about yourself. Buy yourself a spiral notebook and a pen and write down specifics. (Be sure to write in ink because it's useful to go back and see what you were saying as opposed to erasing it, if you didn't like it, because your musings can be a work in progress,...

Lights camera action

When I have a moment to prepare folks who are and participate. If they sit back, just moving far doing TV with me for the first time, I always tell enough forward to be heard takes energy, and them to sit forward in their chairs. Doing so puts then their moment in the spotlight may be gone. them right in the middle of things, ready to go As I'm sure you've figured out, the woman who wears the flashy, low cut dress and the man who brags about his conquests may be insecure and trying to convince...

Pre Date Affirmations Sweet Talking to Self

An affirmation is a positive statement about yourself made in the present tense. A few kind words to yourself can calm you instantly, as well as quell any surges of anxiety you may feel as lift-off draws near. Repeat after me I'm a fun, interesting, worthy person. I deserve success and happiness. A date is only a date it's not do-or-die time. I'm calm and fearless. I will enjoy myself tonight, and my date will, too. You're now internally and (if you've read Chapter 11) externally ready to have...