Introduction

You don't have to feel guilty, shameful, or dirty anymore. I know your secret.

I know what "They" have been telling you, and you've been getting the wrong message this whole time because you thought your desires were "unclean" and "immoral."

What's that secret you're hiding?

You want sex.

You want it. I want it. She wants it.

We all want it. Men and women. It's perfectly normal and healthy.

Now there are about 5 or 6 billion people on this planet, and we all evolved away from a tribe of a few hundred thousand that originated in an area that is now Africa. We stood up from being hairy little apes, and we stopped dragging our knuckles, figuring it would be a change to start walking upright and get a little civilized.

The way we managed this stupendous feat of changing from hairy little creatures to the people you see today is by having sex. Lots of it. Enough to make cute little babies that grow up and have more sex, and more babies ... And then, suddenly, VOILA! You have evolution. Pretty cool, huh?

I think you see my point. Sex is not a bad thing, even though there are many who would have you believe otherwise. Where we run into problems is when we start wondering, "Gosh, my priest/mother/sister/aunt/pastor/friend (choose your source of guilt and judgment) says that sex for any other purpose than procreation is wrong. We'll be banned from Heaven." You mean to tell me that the greatest bonding experience and intimate contact between men and women can only be used to make more people?

Look, I won't judge your religious or moral beliefs. That's not my place. But let me share with you my stance on the topic:

I was brought up Roman Catholic, as most Italians are. I went to church dutifully with my parents each Sunday. But my father was more of a free-thinker. He saw hypocrisy and human weakness corrupting this supposedly "holy" establishment. But he

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didn't lose faith; he simply questioned the things that other people told him were true. In many cases, those things were very false. As a result, I grew up to question beliefs and what was assumed since birth. It's easy to accept what you're told, because then you don't have to go through the effort of thinking.

And there if there is one task a man will go to any lengths to avoid it is thinking.

And, truth be told, most of the people out there (90%+ of the population) is just following the rest of the herd. It takes many years for the voices of reason to get through to the establishment. So old thoughts still persist. Most people still believe after decades and decades of research that colds can be caused by being cold. (Blame your mother for that one. "You'll catch a chill!")

Did you know that your religion is considered an inherited trait by sociologists? They consider something that you can willingly choose to participate in as a trait that you acquire from your parents, and from theirs before.

What does this mean? It means that you are expected to take a belief system from your ancestors and almost never question it. You are expected to accept the rules of that faith, even if you are always feeling a little uneasy inside, that some of what they tell you, just doesn't ring true.

Ever notice that these churches always label that small, questioning voice inside of you as "Satan"? If they label your internal compass as some evil being you can't trust - as "bad" - then they can control you and tell you what to think and do.

I'm not telling you to go out and burn your bible or throw away your faith, but I am telling you that if you blindly accept the beliefs that many religions force on you, you will discover that there are many are subtle forms of control at work beneath them.

I think you see where I'm going with this. Sexual morality is highly subjective.

We've seen preachers and Pundits fall from their lofty thrones of gold, people like Jimmy Swaggart and the Jim and Tammy Faye Bakkers. We've seen the scandal of the Catholic Church as it tries to hide the fact that when you suppress your sexuality, you create the very devils you claim to fight.

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Marriage? I hope you are aware that marriage is a fairly recent invention in our history. Sex before marriage is (and always has been) fairly commonplace. It's a natural desire for us, as natural as the need for shelter and clothing and social ties. You are no more wrong to want short relationships than a person would be to desire a long relationship, even though society has been quick to judge those who don't want lifelong relationships as "bad" in some way.

The problem is that men and women get together for one of two reasons: Attraction, or Necessity. Every romantic involvement with a woman needs to start with a passionate seduction to satisfy you and her for the long run, much less the short term. I've gotten together with women just because I thought I could have a long-term relationship with them, trying to ignore that I didn't really feel they were sexually exciting. And that came back to bite me on the ass every single time. I'm sure I'm not the only guy that lowered his standards in hopes of making a possible relationship work at one time or another.

Seduction, gentlemen, is not bad.

It is absolutely necessary.

There are two ways you can handle your sex life:

1. You can continue to pretend you know it all, and that you're getting the sex you want. You keep doing what you're doing and you'll keep getting what you're getting. If you honestly believe deep in your heart that you are getting all the results you desire, then you're one of the privileged few men who is really achieving with women. Congratulations...

2. You can admit that there's more to learn, and that you can get more than you've been getting. You're willing to set aside your ego and learn what it takes to meet and seduce women. You're willing to invest a little to reap rewards that you will enjoy for a lifetime.

Think about it for a second. There are only a few possibilities when it comes to understanding women:

1. A woman will only sleep with good looking men, or men with money and fame. Qualities that are nearly impossible for you to control.

WRONG. We know this isn't true, because you see average or less-than-average looking guys who get laid, and they don't have any money or fame.

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2. A woman will only sleep with men because of luck, fate, or some mystical formula that only the ancients know.

WRONG. There are guys out there who know exactly how to attract women on a regular basis.

3. A woman will sleep with a man because she is attracted to him, because of rules that can be learned and repeated.

RIGHT. A woman sleeps with a man who excites her enough for her attraction mechanism to start. Exciting her is a process of using some established rules of behavior. And these success rules are always repeatable.

Women want sex as much as men do. This isn't any big secret. And if you can understand the objections and hurdles a woman puts in between you and her, you can handle them and navigate right around them, all the way to your goal of seduction.

I'm sure you've been with your other male buddies in a bar and listened to them as they all spot the hot women, and talk a good game about her. They make some analysis of her looks, and then her boobs and her tush. Some of them even make a few comments about what they'd do in bed with her.

But no one ever does anything about it. They are all as clueless and scared as the rest of the guys in the bar who don't have the first idea of how to approach her and interact with her on the same playing field. In their minds, they've already written themselves out of the possibility of sleeping with a woman like that.

A little later on, you see a guy talking with that same woman, and she's laughing away at his jokes, flipping her hair back, and touching his arm as if she's known him forever, but you know she's only just met him. And the worst part is, he's not even good looking! And his tie looks like he just shot his couch. What does this guy have? What could he possibly know that allows him to go in there and be confident to chat up beautiful women?

Self-confidence comes from a belief in yourself, as well as a belief in your abilities. That guy had an understanding of what makes a woman interested, and he only had to take a chance on the first part - talking to her. From there, he only had to engage her attraction mechanism so that she would respond and find him interesting.

I don't know about you, but I got tired of sitting with the guys who were all talk and I wanted to get some of the action.

© 2003 - Carlos Xuma - DD Publishing - All Rights Reserved -

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Here's a secret, and it may make this the most valuable free e-book you've ever read:

Women cannot select the men they feel attracted to.

Women cannot choose this voluntarily, any more than you can choose the women you find visually attractive. Think about that. Once you know the principles of how to start her thinking about you in a certain way, you can use them over and over again to get her attraction started for you.

I've seen a lot of other programs and books out there, and this book shows you the reality behind what happens during seduction, from start to finish. You'll learn exactly how to find, meet, attract, excite, kiss, and move all the way to the bedroom with a woman. Cocky and funny only gets you so far before you need the real skills necessary to get you to bed with a woman. There are only a few mental paths at work in a woman, and The Seduction Method shows you what they are and how to handle each one to further you toward your seduction goal.

Now, if you're reading this book, I assume you want to learn more about having sex with women. And that's perfectly okay and normal. What I do not suggest is that you use any of these tactics for deceitful or hurtful influence on women. Nor do I want anyone to coerce, force, or use negative manipulation to get sex, or have it indiscriminately or unsafely. You can sleep with women without doing anything deceitful or harmful - to yourself, or her.

Women have always guarded their sexuality. It's been a necessity of evolution, since we were hiding out in caves from mammoths and saber-tooth tigers. A woman could not give herself sexually to a man she didn't think would be capable of supporting her and any child she might have. Her behavior was forged from necessity.

Today, women can engage in sex for pleasure and not worry about pregnancy by using birth control. However, thousands of years of evolution are not cancelled out in just a hundred years of rubbers and pills. But since women haven't caught up to this, we can help them enjoy this freedom and help them overcome their own objections.

Seduction isn't just for a woman you want to sleep with. You can seduce the girlfriend in your life, your wife, or even your friends and family. You can seduce your

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boss on a great idea that could get you promoted. You can seduce your dog into doing tricks.

You see, seduction is nothing more than a highly charged, emotionally persuasive sales job.

Women want exactly the same things you do: sexual experience, unchained from all the repression and guilt. They want to sleep with you and enjoy physical pleasure. They just have different social, psychological, and instinctual expectations. We explore these in the e-book, as well as discuss the methods of overcoming them so that you both can get what you want.

Here's how we're going to learn The Seduction Method:

o How to prepare for seduction - what to think, wear, and keep on you to be ready o We'll go through some basic psychological principles of women (and men) that will explain what the thought process is going on behind the scenes o We'll go over a simple seduction plan that every man can use to increase his sexual success o We'll discuss some of the situations you'll find yourself in, and how to handle them o We'll give you specific strategies and tactics to handle situations as they come up - including phrases and the exact words o We'll review an actual seduction situation and break down what works and what didn't work

Let's get a few things straight. Men do not want only sex. But we do want it sooner and with fewer commitments. Most women treat us as if we're "wrong" for this desire, but it's actually not a matter of "right" and "wrong." It's a matter of doing what you want, with no guilt or manipulation from others to mess with your head. Don't let women make you feel dirty or shameful for wanting sex. It's another manipulation.

WWW.SEDUCTIONMETHOD.COM So, Who IS This Carlos Guy?

There are a lot of books out there written by people who observe and watch, but never do. This is especially true of the seduction systems you see out there on the market. I've read plenty of them, and I'm very sure that most of these guys have dabbled a little with their techniques, but not lived them.

In fact, most of the books you get in the self-help sections seem to be written by people who have success in only two things: meditation, and getting their book published. If you've seen the pictures and the biographies of the authors of most of the relationship books in particular, you know that they are just as messed up as the rest of us. (One particularly famous author has been married in excess of five times, and is close to being a certifiable basket case.)

And none of them have any experience in seduction.

Observation is good, and essential. Most of the great realizations come from observation and seeing what others are doing that works, and then having the ability to write it down in a way that others can understand and use. I, however, can do both. Let me give you a little of my own background, and you be the judge of how reputable I am as a source.

Christian De Meco (from Dating Dynamics, our affiliate) has a wonderful saying that he talks about all the time:

"I had this guy I used to work with back in the financial services business. He always used to say that when he wanted fnancial advice, he went to the guy with the pile of money that was bigger than his, not some down-and-out stockbroker picking his stocks out of a hat. If you want to learn how to do something, go to someone who is doing what you want to do."

I believe in that advice, 110%. You can't sit there and watch the game from the sidelines and be what they call a Monday-morning quarterback, the guy that thinks he knows everything about the game, but has never gone out there on the field and played it. You need to jump in there and get dirty. As Michael Biehn in the movie "The Rock" says, "Sir, we've spilled the same blood in the same mud."

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When I got to my early twenties, I even had a few of what some people call long-term relationships. Mixed in-between was a lot of seduction. Somewhere in my mid-twenties I started to slow down and think about what it was that had created this success I was having. When I started analyzing, I started having more gaps without sex, but much more insight as I figured out what the secret was to attracting and sleeping with women. From average to beautiful.

Then, I had my epiphany, or great revelation. It came when I was dating women from the personal ads in Kansas City. I had met this cute art student who was doing creative landscaping for people's homes in the area. We had gone out one night for some drinks and had a good time. We came back to my apartment, and we were drinking some beer and talking when I had this realization. It was an "a-ha!" moment that I'll never forget.

All this time I'd been working on what I was doing to attract and interest women, or how I was doing it. What I was failing to see was what my underlying attitude was in these situations.

Invariably, I found that these things were consistent about the failures:

o Too "nice" - Made a lot of compliments, a lot of flattery o Went on "dates" - Took women to movies and dinners o Too needy - I acted like I wanted and needed their approval o Waited for signals from her before acting and moving forward (no risking on my part)

And this was what was consistent about the successes: o Used a lot of humor o Teasing and making fun of her - treating her like a pesky brat o Behaved like I didn't need her - very independently o Moved in aggressively with every woman - regardless of what I thought her interest was o Acted very arrogant and cocky

When I looked at Lori, the Art Cutie, I suddenly understood what to do.

I put down my beer and asked her, point blank, "Are you attracted to me?" (And my tone said that I couldn't care less what she said.)

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She looked at me, a little shocked, and simply said, "Yes."

Right then and there, I had flipped the switch on to my understanding of how seduction really works with women, and it has nothing to do with being a wonderful man. It has everything with being a man who decides what he wants and goes after it. Without needing it.

It was in the attitude.

Later that night, Lori and I enjoyed some skinny-dipping at the pool in the courtyard of my apartments, as well as several hours of tear-up-the-sheets sex.

Since then, (and this is not bragging, it's to help you realize that I've got the background of understanding to give you the truth about seduction) I've slept with scores of women, and built on that fundamental understanding. I established a new belief system regarding women, and I'm about to share with you the understanding here, in great detail.

Why am I sharing this information?

First of all, because I don't stand to gain by keeping it a secret. Other men deserve to know what it takes to seduce women. They also need to know that it doesn't take good looks, a hot car, or lots of money to do it. If you are able to understand these principles, and I guarantee you will, you can make these strategies work in your life, too.

Love Women

If there's one thing you can do to increase your abilities with women and survive in the seduction world it's developing a genuine love for women. You love their smell, their touch, their looks, their sounds, and their tastes. And you even have to love the things that are so female, like their tests and their bratty behavior and their insecurities. All of it.

Love women. The good and the bad.

If you go out and do nothing but seek to get laid for the sake of your getting off, you won't survive. And even if you do, you won't survive well. If you've got any women-hating issues in your system, eliminate them now. Get them out of your system. A true seducer is a gentleman, and he adores women for who they are, not for who he wants them to be.

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Women have a nature. It's like the fact that the sun shines, and water gets you wet. When you want it to be otherwise, you're just asking for pain. Accept women the way they are and learn to work with their nature. You cannot seduce a woman if you're trying to change her, or if you resent her because of what she is.

Women Want Sex

Up until the last thirty years or so, it was a commonly held misconception that women were somehow frigid or uninterested in sex by nature and had little or no desire for it except to procreate. This fallacy was created by men who thought that since a woman postpones sex, she only "gives it up" to get what she wants - a faithful husband to provide for her.

Women want sex as much as men; they just have a different timetable and requirements before they do. There has been a lot of sexual liberation for women, and even though there are a lot of women that have occasional casual sex, they are still programmed since birth with the fear of being labeled promiscuous. The label of "slut" is still a fundamental fear of almost all women, and it's probably the most damning of judgments a woman can feel is placed on her.

A woman won't listen to any logical rationalization you come up with for her to sleep with you. Talking to her - telling her all the reasons why she should go to bed with you - including being pushy - will not work, and will often backfire and push her away. She has to feel like sleeping with you - with her emotions, not her rational mind. She has to desire it with her own free will. Remember, people make emotional decisions and then justify those decisions later with logic.

(Sex and giving her erotic pleasure is covered in the final chapter of the e-book.)

www.seductionmethod.com Busting the Myth of "Speed Seduction"

You may be familiar with the concept of "speed seduction" and what these techniques claim to be able to do. You will find a lot of hucksters out there who are looking to make a quick buck off you, selling you what they call speed seduction programs and e-books. In reality, these "programs" are a collection of hypnotic techniques that would only work on a woman with the intelligence of a mentally handicapped child.

Speed seduction promises one thing: To appeal to a man's desire to get free and easy sex, as quickly as possible. All those speed seduction techniques do is supposedly shorten the gap from the time you see a woman you desire on the street to the time you get in bed and have sex with her. The concept plays on your impulse for immediate gratification, and it is never as easy as the ads say it is. And it's never that fast.

What you will learn here is how seductions works, from the ground up, and how to do it as fast as any particular woman will allow you to. No faster. Why? Because she already has a mechanism inside her that will prevent you from going faster than her engine can take. If you go past the redline, the brakes slam on, the engine seizes, and you've failed. But once you learn how to drive this car, you'll see that you don't need to worry about destroying it if you just learn the right attitude and techniques.

Call this method you're about to learn "speedier seduction" instead of speed seduction, if you will, because it's real and it does work. You may not be able to get her instantly, but there is really no man who can. You can't meet a woman on the street and expect to be back at your place having sex in a few minutes. The only place this happens (other than in dreams and with prostitutes) is in porn movies, and you know the real world is not like that, don't you?

You have one of two choices when you want to learn how to seduce women:

1) Buy a "speed seduction" course that promises you that you can get laid tonight by stroking her hand a special way and putting her into a hypnotic trance. You quickly figure out that no man in his right mind could make this work except the guy who invented it. You get discouraged, and you've blown $40 or more on a book you'll never read again.

2) You get The Seduction Method, and learn the true principles at work behind seduction. You will find that you can get laid on the first night, or even a couple nights down the road. But you have enough understanding

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that the information makes sense and sticks, and you have long-term success. The kind that lasts the rest of your life.

Remember: You don't need a hot car, or a lot of money, or fabulous good looks to attract and seduce women. You do have to have a good attitude, and that's what we'll build here.

"Imagine us at the coffee shop laughing together and having a good time, and later you being at home feeling that you had a really good time and enjoyed yourself spending time with me over coffee. Now when you think about what I am saying, and all those feelings that I am talking about, doesn't it just make sense that we go and have coffee together now?"

I have to tell you that this was an actual posting I found that other "seduction artists" put up on the Internet and seriously feel is going to help other guys out there. Can you see yourself saying this to a woman? Without laughing in the middle of saying it? How about without her laughing in the middle?

That approach is formed from the basis of an NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming) technique, but has been so grossly misrepresented from the true delivery and technique that you might find yourself trying it out, getting laughed at hysterically, and wondering how the heck anyone makes these "speed seduction" techniques work. And you'd be right to wonder.

You can't just memorize and use these lines with women without a true understanding of what makes her interested in a man, much less attracted and excited. These are the things you will learn in The Seduction Method. Not hokey hypnosis lines that you won't be able to understand or use.

Contrary to popular belief, the phrase above would not work with any woman that wasn't mentally handicapped. You have to know that, first, she needs to have certain feelings and understandings in place (along with your attitude) that will make it

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simple to get her to go with you to the coffee shop. You shouldn't have to induce a "time distortion" or suggestion (that's the terminology for what this technique is trying to do) in order to get her to come along. You have to do this with fundamentals. Not tricks.

If you don't have the fundamentals, it's like trying to snowboard down a doubleblack diamond slope the very first time you're on a board. If you actually were able to stay up for any period of time, you'd probably find yourself with a tree implant. And, if by some miracle you made it to the bottom in one piece, you still wouldn't be able to recreate the success if you wanted to go back up the mountain and do it again. You need to know the what-where-when-why-how of snowboarding to repeat this.

That's where your fundamentals come in.

The Fundamental Problem With Men

Guys have undergone a significant change in the last half of the twentieth century, and early into the 2000s. A significant part of the male population has grown up as children of single-parent families, and custody has been mostly left with the mothers.

As a result, men seek approval like never before. We either had mothers that over-protected us, or were never there. And then we lacked good male role models. We grew up learning that our mothers were always there for us, and the way to get what we wanted was through female approval. We wanted mommy to approve of us, so we did what she said we ought to. So, while on one hand we were being conditioned to seek approval from women as our sense of validation, on the other hand we believed the fictitious nonsense they filled us with regarding how to treat women.

"Always respect a woman," they would tell us, which is true, but they never explained that the best way to respect a woman is to show some backbone and grow a set of balls. "Be nice to girls," they told us. Nice, huh? So men were left on their own to interpret "nice" to mean: "bend over backwards and supplicate like a wimp."

We are entering a new age, where men are losing touch with their masculinity. It is going to take an active education of the masses to get this message out to guys everywhere, but in the age of the Internet, I'm hopeful that we can get there. You see, a hundred years ago, a book like this wasn't necessary. Men assumed a leadership role, and while that age of society may not have respected feelings (as today's society seems so obsessed by), it did allow for a clearly defined gender role. Today's men and women seem so confused by what was once the easiest thing in the world to understand: what a man and woman's roles are.

Now, I'm not some kind of chauvinist that believes that women are only good if they're barefoot and pregnant, or that they shouldn't have an equal footing with men in authority and earnings in the workplace. What I have been witnessing in the last 30 or so years (especially in the workplace) is the feminization of men and the masculinization of women. Unfortunately, we haven't been taking on the good traits of either gender. Men have been getting wimpy, passive, and approval-seeking. Women have been getting bossy and aggressive. (The unfortunate thing about America is that our corporate pecking order has convinced women that they need to assume the worst traits of men to make it in business.) Men are trying to be women; and women are trying to be men. It's no surprise that everyone is unhappy with the "single's scene" today. Nobody knows who they are.

© 2003 - Carlos Xuma - DD Publishing - All Rights Reserved -

Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit WWW.seductionmethod.com for more information.

This book is necessary today because men and women are losing their essential sexuality. Seduction is a part of that sexuality that is necessary. It's not a bad, manipulative act; it's a validating and affirming act. As men, we owe it to women to become what we once were: strong, decisive, and confident.

NLP - Modality

One of the principles of NLP, or Neuro-Linguistic Programming, is the use of modality. At some point, you should find out what your seduction target's modality of learning is: auditory, kinesthetic, or visual. Most people have a sense that they prefer to use when it comes to their learning style. We all use our hearing, sight, or touch in some way to learn and understand new material. We use them all at one point or another, but just about everyone has one they use most of the time. You can figure out which modality it is by listening to how they describe things. Here are a few examples:

o Kinesthetic: "That just doesn't feel right to me." "Oh, that feels so cold and depressing." "I can't come to grips with that." This person is typically a kinesthetic learner. Recognize her by the tactile words she uses. She learns by doing or touching. She probably likes handholding and hugging to establish security. She will also like to fidget by playing with things, like her straw, or toy with the buttons on her jacket. Her hobbies will probably revolve around her modality, too.

o Auditory: "That just doesn't click." "That just doesn't sound right." "I hear what you're saying."

These keywords tip you off that she is mostly auditory. The words that highlight hearing are used most frequently. She learns by hearing instructions. This type of woman is very suggestive and responds well to NLP techniques.

o Visual: "I see what you're saying." "That's not the way I see it." nLooks good to me."

This person is showing a disposition to visual modes of learning. Even when referring to words or sounds, she will use the word "see" as in the first example. She learns by seeing, or reading instructions with diagrams. She is probably very fashion conscious.

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Understanding a woman's modality not only helps you communicate better with her about sex (finding out if talking dirty, watching porn, or dancing close will excite her), but also how she will respond in conversation.

o Use magic on the women that are visual.

o Use your speech and charged words on the auditory ladies.

o And use your sense of touch - palm reading and kino - on the kinesthetic women.

(In the complete e-book, the next section covers kinaesthetics, since it is one of the most important NLP

techniques to utilize in your seduction.

I recommend men learn how to use this particular method on ah women.)

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