Being Genius Enough to Admit to Ignorance

Think back to the most interesting people you've ever met. Remember, in particular, one who seemed especially confident and comfortable with him- or herself. Was this person spouting information and ideas, or enthusiastically listening to what you had to say? Did this person seem to have all the answers, or did he or she seem excited to hear what you had to say?

Heart Brakes

No rn^ttCr how rich and varied your life experience! have been, don't make a habit of blurting out your whole life story to anyone who will listen. That's a real turn-off to most people. Don't ever feel compelled to give every bit of information about yourself ali at once. Instead, exude confidence, wrap yourself in a bit of mystery, and you will be alluring, enticing...and seductive, v-__/

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The plain truth is that we appreciate someone who has enough smarts to say "I don't know. Can you tell me?" This kind of person knows how to make the people around him or her feel important, and, by so doing, makes him- or herself more desirable to be around. Remember, sometimes the greatest conversationalists are the ones who know when to keep silent and listen. Think of yourself as a very flattering mirror. Let people see, in your eyes, an attractive reflection of themselves, and they will find you more attractive. Here are a few clues to follow when you're trying to inspire someone to be interested in you:

• Nobody likes a know-it-all. Few people are as annoying as those who feel compelled to dominate a conversation by showing how intelligent, wise, or learned they are. Such a person is clearly stating that what they have to say is more important than what anyone else has to say. Just as you would go out of your way to avoid such a person, make a real effort never to be one.

• Everybody wants to be a teacher sometimes. It makes people feel good to know they have something valuable to offer. Having the opportunity to broaden someone else's awareness is a real boost to the self-esteem.

• Learning and self-respect are not mutually exclusive. People who are insecure and doubt their self-worth will lie down and die before they admit, even to themselves, that they are ignorant about anything. People with a healthy self-image, however, are more concerned with learning something new than with appearing to know everything. Since self-confidence is a very important part of seductiveness (and an all-encompassing storehouse of knowledge is not), it makes more sense to admit that you don't know something than to pretend that you do. Besides, when it becomes apparent that you really don't know what you're talking about (and trust me, it will), any semblance of allure you might have established will fly out the window.

Look at the world as your oyster. It is waiting to share with you its many wonders. You have only to go looking for them. Treat every day as if it were the most important day—even the only day you have—and go out and learn as many things as you can possibly learn.

Ask the Love Coach

Seductive people listen and I earn from others. Remember, theje is nothing wrong with just listening and not having something bo contribute to a conversation Other than yo-ur inquisitrveness, (Besides., a little silence can make you quite intriguing.)

Many of the principles of becoming intellectually seductive are simple, but most people forget them. Therefore, if you use them, you will stand out from the crowd. With your desire to become more alluring, along with your ever-increasing understanding of these principles, you'll be attracting new and fascinating people in no time. Other people will want to be around you and will be eager to be seduced by you.

Continue reading here: Ask the Love Coach

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