Drop Dead Gorgeous Defined

While men are, as a rule, visually oriented, and are frequently quite verbal in describing what they find attractive in a woman, a little bit of probing reveals they are not as universally obsessed with specific parts of the female anatomy as one might think. When my male clients describe their image of a beautiful woman, they may well begin by describing a full, well-proportioned bust line, or a taut, toned bottom. Almost without exception, however, they go on to describe the woman's eyes, and how those eyes seemed to beckon with some hidden promise. Other times, they go into great detail, describing a smile that held laughter even in its silence, or soft, pouting lips that seemed to beg to be kissed.

When I press the men for specific details, such as the color of the woman's eyes or the actual physical shape of her mouth, the guys seem to falter a bit. It seems that they are enthralled not so much by the actual physical characteristics as by their own interpretation of what those characteristics represent. In short, they are describing the spirit behind the physical.

You may be thinking, "Great! I can work on the shape of my butt, and wear clothes that enhance my bust line, but how in the world can I change what the shape of my lips ' says' to a certain man, or what the color of my eyes communicates to him?"

Here's where the really good news comes in. While you can (and should) continue to work to keep your physical body in healthy condition, you can have an even greater effect by working on your attitude. Tell yourself what a mouth-watering morsel you are, and imagine every head in the room turning to admire you as you enter. Like Julia in Chapter 3, you can imagine your every move to be a sensuous dance. Imagine your mouth uttering some profoundly seductive promise to the ear of every man in the room. Imagine your eyes saying, "Perhaps..." to every gaze you meet.

And when you're actually with a man, focus all those promises of untold pleasures upon him alone, as if he were the only man in creation. Again, by seducing yourself you are seducing any man who comes in contact with you, even from across a crowded room.

Here is an exercise you can use to hone your self-image and prepare yourself for your "grand entrance:"

1. Take a long, leisurely bubble bath, adding your favorite fragrance to the bath water. You might even want to light some candles and turn the light off. Put some sensuous music on the stereo, perhaps Sade, Leonard Cohen, or some jazzy Billie Holiday. As you sink into the warm water, focus on the sensations it offers your skin. Feel how it literally draws the tension from your body, and allow yourself to sigh softly as you give yourself up to the experience. As you wash your body, luxuriate in your own touch, focusing on each sensation as your fingers glide across your skin.

2. When you are finished, emerge from the bath to a brand new, extra plush bath towel. Pat yourself dry as you would have a lover do it, relishing in the softness of the towel upon your skin, as well as the suppleness of your body beneath your fingertips. Imagine how glorious that body must feel to a man.

3. After you are dry, splash on some refreshing cologne, making sure to apply it to all those places where you would want your man's attention to be drawn.

Standing before the mirror, illuminated by candlelight, gaze appreciatively at each part of your body, imagining your man's pleasure if he could see through your eyes right now.

For HER Eyes Only

For HER Eyes Only

Over and over again in surveys, men have tofd me they are really turned on by a feminine woman, i began to question what that means. is it aJI about frills and froufrou? No, not really, A woman can be a carpenter in overall and still be feminine. Femininity is at once mere abstract and more profound than ali the outer trappings with which wti've come to associate it, The simplest way to put it is that a feminine woman mukei n man fee/ like a man in her presence. And don't wony; we're not talking about old-fashioned, sexist rote playing, but rather about the very essence cf masculinity and femininity.

4. Now, as you dress, let each article of clothing you put on be a conscious attempt to amplify your seductiveness. The garments touching your skin must be soft and smooth as a lover's lips, and must be as beautiful as the woman you wish to be. The outfit you wear must serve as a subtle, but clear, reminder of the seductress upon which they are draped. They hint at pleasures just beyond his reach, on the fringes of his dreams.

5. Apply your make-up carefully, and conservatively. Imagine that your lips are the portrait of unspoken promise, adorned with the care of a Botticelli. Your eyes are their own deep pools of passion, and need only a subtle touch to draw his attention to them. Once there, he will be lost in their allure.

6. After you finish dressing and venture out into the presence of the object of your desire, remember the sight of your own nakedness as you stood before the mirror. Hold the image of that sexy, seductive, confident woman in your mind, remembering that this beauty was no air-brushed super model—it was you, in all your glory.

Continue reading here: Seductive Is As Seductive Does

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