Enjoy the Moment But Dont Forget to Look Ahead

Let's say your partner (and you) have passed all of the tests. Do the clothes start flying off now? Well, not so fast; I've still got a few questions for you. Whether or not a permanent commitment is in the cards, you need to look beyond that glorious night of passion you are planning. After the seduction, what's next? How will the two of you feel about each other and about yourselves? Will your morning-after experience be champagne brunch or coyote love? What do you and your partner hope to gain from the relationship, besides a good romp? Might this relationship actually have a future?

Nobody can predict the future with 100 percent accuracy, but you can certainly come up with a working version, based on what you know about yourself and your prospective lover. We're going to discuss "the future" in more detail later on in this book, but it's never too early to begin thinking about it. Ask yourself (and your partner) the following questions, and pay attention to your gut feelings. Questions 1 and 2 are particularly important, because if the two of you have radically differing expectations, that can spell big trouble. You might feel somewhat uncomfortable with questions 3 through 6, but don't let that stop you. A little honesty at this point can mean the difference between afterglow and after burn.

1. What am I expecting from this relationship (beyond a good time in bed)?

2. What is my partner expecting from this relationship (beyond a good time in bed)?

3. Will he/she still like me afterwards?

4. Will I still like him/her afterwards?

5. Will I still like myself?

6. Will my partner still like himself/herself?

Continue reading here: The Bottom Line Choose with Care

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