For HIS Eye Only

Men, here's a hot tip for encf-of-the-date behavior: Don't make any attempt to kiss her! This is especially effective if f 1J you have a reputation at a ladies' man or (Z) you feel she's a hit Out of your league. It's also important for you to have given her clues during the evening that you actually find her very attractive. While I don't usually advocate playing games with each other, the disparity between your other actions and words, and your failure to even attempt to kiss her good night will leave a woman wondering. Don't juit leave her hanging, though; either -use the suggestions I gave earlier (that is, trace her Upi vrfth your fingertips), or go ahead and ask her out again. The end nciultwiFI actually be an increase in her interest in you. It's all part of the delicious art of sexual tendon, only it goes even deeper than that,

• For you women, a big smile at the end of the date can speak volumes. A light touch on his hand, his cheek, or even his lips can set the idea in his mind that you enjoy his company. It doesn't take any grand gesture to make him feel like a winner, just a few subtle clues. And if he leaves feeling like a winner, he will almost certainly be back.

• For you men, the same thing goes about the big smile. Let her know what you enjoyed about the time you spent together, and that you think you'd like to see her again, but don't push for a set time or date just yet. A woman who feels truly beautiful at the end of the date with you will probably be more than enthusiastic about seeing you again. As for kissing her, don't push it; do what comes naturally for both of you. In fact, there are some alternatives to kissing that can be very seductive to a woman (also see sidebar). Trace her lips with your fingertips, caress her cheek, and, perhaps, say, "You'll be hearing from me." (And keep that promise.)

Of course, these gestures of delight could very well result in someone bringing up the subject of a second date, and that person may as well be you, right? After all, if there's going to be a seduction, you've got to go out again. So why not go ahead and ask for a second date then and there? The worst your partner can do is say no. And remember, if you avoid asking the person because you're afraid of being rejected, then you are doing your own rejecting. At least, by making an attempt, you stand a chance of getting a yes. You're also displaying confidence, which is very seductive.

Heart Brake«


If your date doesn't quite say yes, but doesn't give you an unequivocal no, either, maybe he or she is simply undecided. Your partner may well need time to "rate the date." Don't give up. Go home, do your own date rating, and go about your life. If you haven't heard from this person within a week or so, pick up the phone yourself. If he or she still seems to be hedging, it's probably time to start looking for someone else. It makes no sense to waste your time on somebody who just isn't interested in you.

If, however, both of you are interested enough in each other to go out a second time, there is only one more fundamental rule you need to follow: Have fun! Remember, the whole purpose of all this effort, of the seduction, and, indeed, of being together in the first place, is to enjoy yourselves. If you keep it honest, and continue to be fully present with each other, the enjoyment will come naturally, and it will be well worth all the effort and uncertainty you have both faced in the process.

For HER Eyes Only

For HER Eyes Only

Worried because he hain't cafled you back after the first date? There are any number of reasons a man doesn't cail back, even if be is genuinely interested. Even if both of you had a great time on your date, sometimes a man just has to think about it for a few days. He might even be worried that he'll seem boo eager if he calls you back right away. Give him at least a week, and if you haven't heard from him, go ahead and give him a call. Keep it light, and don't put any pressure on him, but let him know that you are still interested. If he simply thought you weren't interested, this will show him that you are. ^---------

Or...Polite Exit?

If you know by the end of the date that you don't want to go out with the person again, be courteous, but clear. I don't care if your date was an insufferable bore, and you spent the entire time wishing you would be abducted by terrorists, just to get away. You owe it to your date—and to yourself—to be as kind as you are honest when you decline the offer for another interaction. Tell the person that you appreciate his or her interest, but you don't feel that the two of you are a match. Don't try to lay blame, and don't feel that you have to put the other person down. It simply didn't work out; you're just different people. Wish the person the best, and go your separate ways.

No matter how disastrously incompatible you feel the two of you are, make every effort to end the date on a congenial note. Allow the other person the dignity of leaving with his or her self-esteem intact. (That's what you'd hope someone would do for you, right?)

Continue reading here: Rate Your Date

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