Learning to Listen Using Your Ears and Your Heart

The single most critical element of emotional seductiveness is the ability to listen to others, not merely understanding their feelings on an intellectual level, but empathizing and "being there" with them. Emotionally seductive people are phenomenal listeners.

In order to be truly seductive to someone, you have to make the person fee] that you share or can empathize with his or her feelings pain, fear, anger, elation, No matter what the person is feeling, yQu need to be emotionally available.

Wordplay

In order to be truly seductive to someone, you have to make the person fee] that you share or can empathize with his or her feelings pain, fear, anger, elation, No matter what the person is feeling, yQu need to be emotionally available.

Kristin, a client of mine, understands this well. She has a dear friend who recently lost her husband. "Most people don't like to be around someone who has just lost a loved one," Kristin says. "It's very difficult. You want to offer comfort and support, but it seems that anything you say sounds trite and empty. Intellectual jargon or hypothetical platitudes are not going to make them feel any better. All I can really offer my friend is my complete presence with her. She knows that to the best of my ability I'm understanding how she feels, and I am actually sharing her pain."

Those are wise words. Of course, this principle doesn't apply only to talking with the bereaved. Practice the art of compassionate listening with everybody, every day. Learn to listen with your heart, not just your ears.

Continue reading here: Fools Rush In But Seductive People Listen

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