Your Intellectual Presence

Now that you've established an alluring physical presence, and have started to use the power of your mind to enhance it, the next step is to establish your intellectual presence. Sure, you look great, and, if you've been working on your voice (see Chapter 3), you're probably sounding better than ever—but that's not enough. To be truly seductive, you've got to have something interesting to say.

What is intellectual presence? It's a combination of several factors, including:

• The way you think. This is manifested in many ways, some of the most obvious being your opinions and your means of expressing those opinions.

• The way you reason. This is your ability to draw conclusions from the information at hand. Though this ability might vary depending on the situation, most of us are often at a middle ground between the cold and consummate logic of Star Trek's Mr. Spock and the artlessness of Forrest Gump.

• How good you are at understanding other people's ideas. Good listening skills are a must here; but beyond that, you should at least be capable of asking intelligent questions. A blank stare is not alluring.

These are all factors that make up your intellectual presence. But your powers of thinking, reasoning, and understanding simply do not develop in a vacuum. They have to be fed. Certainly they are nurtured by your self-talk, but in order to give them a truly balanced "diet," you need to learn about things that are outside your personal arena.

Ask the Love Coach

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis was renowned for her ability to totally captivate every dinner partner who ever sat next to her. Her secret? Jackie knew the magic of eye contact. She would focus on her dinner partner at if that person were the only other individual at the table rather than trying to see what else was going on at the table. The leison we can learn from Jackie O ij if you want someone to be interested in you, let the object of your desire see that you are truly interested in him or her. You'll be amaied at the results.

Ask the Love Coach

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis was renowned for her ability to totally captivate every dinner partner who ever sat next to her. Her secret? Jackie knew the magic of eye contact. She would focus on her dinner partner at if that person were the only other individual at the table rather than trying to see what else was going on at the table. The leison we can learn from Jackie O ij if you want someone to be interested in you, let the object of your desire see that you are truly interested in him or her. You'll be amaied at the results.

Continue reading here: World of Things to Be Curious About

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