Teeth for the purpose of fight I Selfharm like scratching pulling at own hair or hitting self

These could be displacement gestures, suggesting displaced aggression The point is, who do they feel aggressive about?

Remember to be perceptive in the workplace, taking note of your colleagues' body language gestures, but always keep in mind that no one gesture will ever "give the game away . " Make sure you're firing on all cylinders, listening to what's said, watching for their general behavior, looking for clues in things like the tone of their voice, and monitoring their body language, both the "performed" gestures and their "leakage" signals .


• Never underestimate your killer occasions in the workplace. Plan, practice, and rehearse

• Remember, these are performance skills. Learn how to warm up and how to project. Merely "being yourself" will not be enough!

• Get out of your comfort zone on a regular basis. The more you stretch yourself, the better you will begin to feel

• Remember, even small details like the way you hold your pen might leak more away about your inner feelings than you realized .

• Be visually aware. Although there are no exact symptoms when it comes to reading other people in the workplace, by increasing your eye scanning you'll have a far greater understanding of the way their minds work

Although this book will have given you huge insights into how we think and behave, I do hope you won't become one of those body language know-it-alls who announce to all that they have almost mystical skills of mind reading. Remember that there are no absolutes, but remember too that it's the very complexity of body language that makes it so fascinating. Your study of body language should be an on-going hobby or science. We're all experts and you probably began this book with much more knowledge than you realized.

Keep positive about your own skills. The greatest changes in your life will be achieved by sculpting your own body language to make it endorse what you say or to speak out on your behalf instead of heckling you. I've taken a tough tone because I know it's easy to give up once you begin to step outside your comfort zone, but I also know that the techniques I've shown you really do work.

The initial effort is worth it, and, don't forget, no one's asking you to be perfect. Never try to clone yourself, but do bring all your best skills and personality traits to the surface . It's the differences that make us special, not the similarities .

guide to terms, words and general jargon used either in this book or by other people!

Absorbed Actions: Those actions we pick up via subconscious copy

Accelerated Blink Rate: When an adrenalin surge, caused by stress or anger, makes the blink rate increase Active-listening Signals: Actions that include nodding, facial mirroring, tilting the head, etc , to show you're listening to someone Adaptors: The name given to the small gestures someone makes when in a state of cognitive dissonance or anxiety This would include self-comfort gestures such as facial touch Aggressive Arousal: A state of anger where physical symptoms are produced In body language terms, this can be jaw tightening, muscle clenching, and the use of fists or ritualized weapons like finger pointing or head batoning

Air-hump: The subtle pelvic jerks that a man may do while talking to his friends when he sees a woman he is attracted to

Air-kiss: A cheek-to-cheek kiss that may not involve touching

Alerting Signals: Raising a hand, removing spectacles, doing eye-flashes (see page 287), and so on, to show a desire to speak

Ambivalent Signals: Using different signals, both of which are genuine, performed at the same time but send out different messages

Ankle-lock Gesture: Standing with your ankles crossed together

Announcement Gesture: Also known as alerting signal

Continue reading here: Autocontact Gesture Selftouch

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