The Annoying Alpha

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Some men might become overly concerned about coming across as the main alpha male. However, for most men, this simply won't happen and neither is it necessary. For example, an alpha male will be the one to take up the most amount of space, really spread himself out, and appear loose and relaxed.

He might also become boisterous and order people about. In reality, these men are simply making up for a lack of true confidence and are applying a mask to their personality. Taking up more room than necessary appears far more cocky than confident. The idea is to tread on the razor's edge between the two. Thus, you want to have some characteristics that an alpha male does, such as good posture, taking up (some) space, good voice tone, and so forth, but avoid things like taking up too much space and being too loud and overbearing.

Alpha Body Language

In this photograph, Dave has the right idea but is using it on the wrong woman. He is comfortable enough to take up space with his body. His body is completely open and he is acting like a dominant man. His legs are wide, his arms are open, and his head is cocked. His gaze is all wrong however, as he is giving Scarlett far too much attention. He is also giving her the up-and-down which is a big turn off for women. In reality, Dave is putting Scarlett off because he is treating her like an object. Even though Scarlett isn't directly looking at Dave, she is subconsciously aware of his glare. She avoids his eye contact altogether and if Dave continues to stare, she will most likely leave the area altogether. Her gaze might also be toward another man hoping to be rescued. If her gander was toward you, and if she added a 45 degree head turn then looked downward, you would be advised to steal her away.

We can all recall our first days in a nightclub where everything looked and felt so foreign. Where all the dudes lined up at the bar looked scary with evil grins, leaving no pathway for you to get to the washroom or order a drink. These sorts of people are angry at life in general. They are also the type of people who hang out at the bar every week and

Women Dominating Men

are always sporting the same look on their faces. They are what's called, "lifers," because their life starts and ends Friday and Saturday night at the club. They don't really care about having any fun or even being social, they are just there to check out the women and make life hell for anyone trying to improve themselves. Please don't take their attitude as an example of what to do. You don't need to come across as a muscle bound villain to be an alpha male. These behaviors are not attractive to the vast majority of the quality women in bars either. Be the nice guy who builds people up instead of tearing them down. Be the one who makes people laugh and leaves them better off than before they met. I suppose the alpha male is the extremity of all characteristics that are defined as male. However, they are all exaggerated in a bad way. Don't be afraid to hold some characteristics that are defined as female as well, such as being open to conversation, being social, and being nice. While some will say that nice guys finish last, this isn't entirely true. Women do want a nice guy, but they want him to be somewhat hidden under shreds of maleness.

This is a relaxed body position, but not a dominant one. Mark is using the bar for support and has his arms somewhat crossed. This is a fairly common posture for men who tend to end up as "wallflowers" for the majority of the night. Instead of holding this position for too long, he should move about the room and socialize with others.

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