Working On Your Selfconfidence

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Are you comfortable in your own skin? Are you okay with your own thoughts? These are some of the key issues that will arise when it comes to attracting a mate. Taking the time to think about who exactly you are is a key part of becoming attractive to someone else. Being honest with yourself is also a factor here. It is apparent to others when you are unsure of your own beliefs, or further to this, aren't particularly accepting of yourself. Great confidence comes from examining and accepting your true self. Self-confidence is normally rated very high in terms of attractiveness by the opposite sex. If you practice hard enough, you'll probably be able to temporarily fool people with confident body language, but at some point, in order to have a constructive relationship, you're going to have to face all the buried feelings you have about yourself. It's never too late to improve yourself and there are plenty of ways you can do this. Being a complete and well-rounded person is a lifelong project, and simply by embarking on such a process, you will become more appealing to the opposite sex.

This photograph illustrates how some feel in a novel environment. Mark's face is tensed, his eyebrows are crunched up, and overall, he looks nervous. It's plainly obvious that he isn't comfortable at this location. He would be best to relax his posture and facial muscles. Women won't take well to this look.

When new people enter a room, do you jerk your head to see who it is? This is a bad reaction. Instead you should slowly look left or right and simply observe what is going on around you. If someone calls for your attention, turn slowly to face them instead of coming off as far too eager to please by whipping your head around. Make all your movements deliberate and move in a controlled fashion. Instead of playing with your face and scratching all over your body, make movements more planned and minimal. Unnecessary movements should be eliminated. The idea is to come off as a sort of alpha male but without all the negative connotations associated with it.

Other things to avoid are: fidgeting, playing with your hands or your napkin, shredding the label from your beer bottle, pacing or moving about in your seat, holding your hands awkwardly or making a fist, sitting on your hands, or holding your hands too still. When walking, also make your movements

planned. Don't run about, instead glide from place to place. You should exude confidence.

When speaking, do so slowly and deliberately. People who speak too fast are worried they will be cut off. You'd be surprised how much more people stop to listen to what you say when you speak minimally and with purpose. Dominant males aren't concerned about being cut off by others; their time to speak will come. Also avoid qualifying yourself to others unnecessarily or excessively.

You will notice that if your body language is most dominant all others will focus their body language toward you. If you also engage others and encourage them with eye contact and intermittent nods of approval, they will continue to speak to you and others in the group will submit to you as well.

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