If you get a no, you may want to take a minute to try to figure out why. Make sure you haven't gotten into some bad habits. You may need to ask yourself some tough questions. Are you too eager, too desperate, too whiny, too silly, or too tense Is your breath okay Do you make eye contact
Breath is, quite literally, the essence of life. Deep breathing is the essence of relaxation. Breathing is the cornerstone of almost all meditation. It's chi in Eastern philosophy. Energy. Life force. If you watch a pitcher on the mound, a gymnast before she leaps onto the balance beam, or a professional bowler as he stands, ball in both hands, staring down the pins, they all do the same thing take a deep breath and blow it out. Which is what I want you to do right now. Listen to your heart pumping, your breath inflating and deflating your lungs, and the blood pulsing in your ears.
You don't have to walk away forever, but you do have to walk away. Everybody needs to regain his or her equilibrium after being on storm-tossed seas. Whether the boat sank or floundered on the rocks or was commandeered by pirates, get your breath and your sea legs back. Give yourself some time. It will be time well spent even though it's hard to do.
Because your lips will be close to her ear, your breath can be stimulating the skin surrounding her ear. You'll be stimulating her by your voice. You'll be stimulating her by the soft touch of your breath against her skin. And you'll be stimulating her by your Firmly Gentle touch as you massage her.
Okay, here's the NLP drill Get yourself into a relaxed state by listening to the music or the sound of your own breathing. Buy a book on yoga -- they have some fantastic relaxation breathing techniques. Make sure you have the rubber band in place and have decided on how to snap it every time, (over or under). Once you're relaxed, you need to conjure up a very happy or powerful feeling from your past memories and relive it within your mind. This should be some kind of event or moment when you were swept with feelings of competence and power, as if you'd just won the Stanley Cup and are skating it around the rink held over your head with thousands of people cheering and your team mates surrounding you (what the hell, you won the Con Smythe too ). Not a hockey guy How about a spacewalk in the Shuttle payload bay Floating along and watching the Earth slip by Whatever you decide to use, you'll have to really get into the fantasy until you can feel the chills running up and down your spine....
At the end, give her a hug, then pull back, but still hold her and look into her eyes. Smile and then lean in for the kiss. Make sure your breath is fresh (mints and gum work wonders) and make sure your lips are a little moist. When you hug her, lick your lips a little. Then lean in, tilt your head a little, and make contact with her lips. Then do what feels natural from there.
Deciding to try either Yoga or Pilates right before a date for the first time is unlikely to have much of a calming effect. But if you decide to incorporate either technique in your life on a long-term, regular basis, you may find that you're better able to center your self before any stressful event. You'll discover breathing techniques and ways to focus, which are helpful when you're dating, asking your boss for a raise, or trying to sleep at night. Several studies have found that women who practice Yoga are more i Hatha Yoga Considered classic or basic Yoga, this is for those who are looking for inner peace rather than panting, sweating, and weight loss. You hold postures for a long time, and the emphasis is on deep breathing. Beginners get a taste of basics here.
Swearing off the opposite sex so that you can catch your breath or if you've just come out of a tough situation is not only fine, but wise. But don't confuse this break with fear or hatred. You need to be aware of your feelings so that you can use that big fancy cortex on top of all your other organs including your heart to figure out what's going on.
One that I teach in stress courses is It's not a lion. It links to the thought that although your situation might be important, it's not a matter of life and death you're not being pursued by a man-eating lion Make up your own affirmation and repeat it in your head as a mantra to create calm I Breathing exercises will help . Breathe in through your nose until your lungs are at full capacity, then breathe out slowly via your mouth, allowing your body to empty and relax as you do so I If your hands get sweaty, carry some freshen-up wipes to cool them before you go into a meeting.
If you're feeling brave, you can say, If not now, how soon If you're feeling a bit vulnerable, you can say, Let me give you my number, and you can give me a call when you're ready. The middle ground is to say, Why don't I give you a holler in a week or two and see how you're doing If your potential date says fine, then do it. If he or she says I'll call you, don't hold your breath. Who needs to turn blue
Strive to keep yourself looking your best physically at all times. This doesn't mean being TOO concerned about your appearance it means keeping your nails clean and short, your hands callus-free as much as possible, your UNI-BROW groomed, and your hair trimmed at least every 3 weeks to keep it neat. Be clean-shaven (unless you're going for the unshaven look), and keep your body clean This means showering before going out, and controlling body odor with a good deodorant. Brush your teeth and chew on mint gum to keep your breath fresh. Get enough sleep every night so that you're in top shape for approaching. Avoid drugs and alcohol that will leave you with mood swings, or tired and bloodshot eyes. If you absolutely have to take a couple drinks to loosen up on a night out on the town, keep it reasonable. Avoid beer if you can, because it leaves your breath smelling bad and makes it obvious you've been drinking.
Get out of your chair right now and stand up. Do it, bytch OK, now interlock your fingers together and stretch your arms in front of you, palms facing away from you. Now take a deep breath and bring your arms up over your head, keeping them straight, elbows locked. Push up to the sky and you fill your lungs completely. Hold your breath for 10 seconds while you PUSH upwards Now exhale with a nice, hearty *sigh* and have a seat. Feel different Your mood should have improved slightly as your body thanks you for the release of stored tension. No matter where you are, try to become aware of your breath. Focus your attention on that little groove above your upper lip and feel how the air enters your nose cool and leaves warm. Gradually slow down your pace and take deeper breaths using the following bodily process to divide your breath. When first starting out, you will feel your breathe stop in phases as you shift your breathing from one part of your body to another. With practice, you will...
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