Assumptions about

In writing this book, I made some assumptions about you:

1 You are straight, that is, heterosexual: Statistically, most people are heterosexual, and my goal is to reach the widest audience. Also, many of the issues between opposite-sex dating and same-sex dating are similar, and most are identical. If you find something that I've overlooked, write and tell me what works and what doesn't for you at You can also see current pictures of me there, find out where and when to hear or see me on the radio and television, get my take on current movies and theatre, and see if I've written anything new that might interest you.

1 You are above the age of consent: This book is a grown-up look at a subject that involves us from childhood, so in reading it, remember that when it comes to the sexual parts, I want you over the age of consent — 18, in most cases. Sex is for adult, responsible folk. If you're a minor, read the stuff about sex as something you're going to do someday, but not now (and when you do, take it seriously and respectfully); the rest of the stuff should be pretty useful to you now.

1 You are dating in the United States: Because dating customs vary widely in different parts of the world, writing a book on dating worldwide is a whole different project. As an anthropologist (yeah, I have degrees in just about everything), I, too, am fascinated by cross-cultural stuff. This book focuses on what I know best: U.S. dating customs. If you are not from the

United States, consider this book as a sort of insider's guide to American dating practices, a kind of roundabout way to see how dating in the United States works.

^ You are not a predator: You genuinely care about yourself as well as others and getting to know another human being in an intimate and meaningful way.

^ You wish this book came in a plain brown wrapper: If anybody sees you with it, you say you're buying it for a friend or you heard my radio program and bought it for a giggle. Even my daughter has been tempted to disown me when a date sees my book in her bookcase.

Continue reading here: The Focus Who Am I

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