Speed Bumps on Lifes Highway

In This Chapter

^ Understanding the four stages of attachment ^ Slowing down and savoring ^ Postponing sex ^ Staying in the moment

^ Knowing the differences between liking, lusting, and loving

7 he time span between the end of date number two and the beginning of the rest of your love life is a sort of "like/lust/love" limbo. It's all about potential. You're in the what's-going-to-happen-next? mode. It's not a relationship yet. It's not a full-fledged friendship, either. It's an exciting, sexy, mysterious, scary, thrilling sort of thing — which is just what this stage is supposed to be. It's a time to take it slowly, take stock, keep it all in perspective, and accept your topsy-turvy emotions for what they really are: a natural reaction to what potentially, plausibly, conceivably, hopefully, fingers-crossed, if everything works out, may one day (possibly) be.

This is an especially important time to stay in the moment. Enjoy and don't get too far ahead of yourself. Take time to smell the roses, the coffee, the perfume, the cigars, and the wind. Slowing down: That's the focus of this chapter.

Women are particularly prone to begin planning the color of the bridesmaids' dresses, practicing writing his name as theirs, getting into the prince-on-a-white-stallion mode. It's too early to think about riding off into the sunset. Chill, girl!

Just as you're getting comfortable, understand your date may begin planning ahead. Playing dumb and/or oblivious will cost you more than it's worth in the long run.

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