As a rule of thumb, when you first meet a girl, DON'T talk to her more than once or twice a week, and don't SEE her more than once or twice a week.
If you're chatting online, don't chat more than a couple of times a week.
And DON'T talk for hours and hours and hours in ANY of these situations!
Because when you talk for hours, you start talking about all kinds of WUSSY things.
Do yourself a favor next time...
After a woman comes over to your house and gets physical with you, LEAN BACK.
Don't call the next day and talk hot and heavy. Give it some time and space.
Here's one of my favorite quotes:
"Give her the gift of missing you."
I love that quote.
OK, I think you get the point. Stop acting like a needy WUSS BOY, and start leaning back, being unpredictable, and GIVE HER THE GIFT OF MISSING YOU when you're in a similar situation in the future.
Hi i have been reading your newsletter for about two months now and i really wish i could tell you that i've had outstanding success with the cocky and funny approach but im afraid i cant. You see i just cant even picture myself seeing a gorgeous woman somewhere and just starting some kind of conversation with her out of no where like that. I get really nervous around women and never know what to say to them. And i just can't help but see myself get rejected by her and all the different ways she can turn me down. Any suggestions?
M. from AZ
>>>MY COMMENTS: I have a question for you...
"What if you COULD picture yourself seeing a gorgeous woman somewhere and just starting some kind of conversation with her out of nowhere?"
Is the problem that you can't picture it? Or is the problem that you won't just DO IT?
I mean, what do you think is going to happen?
Do you think that gorgeous women have magical powers and she might turn you into a frog or something?
Here, try this:
Next time you see a beautiful woman, walk over and say:
"Excuse me, can I ask you a question? I'm trying to overcome my shyness, and it's my goal to ask five women today what it takes for them to feel attracted to a man. Do you prefer it when guys try to BUY your attention with gifts and food, or do you prefer it when a guy teases you, makes fun, makes you laugh, and keeps you guessing about what's going to come next?"
Don't even worry about getting emails, numbers, and dates. Just go ask that question.
As a homework assignment, go ask 100 women this question. You'll see that women aren't so scary after all, and you will get some really interesting answers from them.
Now, I don't usually advise asking women for advice on women... but in this case I'm not telling you to ask for advice for advice's sake. You're overcoming shyness at the same time.
After you ask the first 50, I want you to try something new...
After you ask the question, and she answers, I want you to say "Because, you know, I'm really tired of women just treating me like a piece of meat... like some kind of sex symbol or something. I need to understand what I can do so a woman likes me for WHO I AM!" ...in a serious, sarcastic, Cocky and Funny way.
Watch the responses you get. You'll have fun.
Hello David. Well, let me put it this way: I got your book, and it made a HUGE impact on my life. I'd like to assure anyone who doubts you that you are not full of crap, you really know your stuff. Anyway, I have a little problem, and since I feel you've mastered the understanding of the minds of women, I need your help. First of all, I've always had a razor-sharp wit, but I didn't have the confidence to show it to most women, and instead felt sorry for myself that women never got to see the real me. Now, once I was introduced to you and learned the whole cocky routine and seen it's effects, my confidence is sky high. I charm women like you wouldn't believe... while I was happy with this at first, it seems that I have gotten TOO good with women. I know I sound awfully full of myself, but... here's the scoop. When I use my dazzling charm combined with cockiness, new women that i meet CAVE IN to me and become my WHIPPED SLAVE after a short period of time. They lose their sassy and fun personalities, and become obsessed slaves that would do anything to please me. while its sometimes flattering, overall I do not like this. Don't get me wrong, I want them to want me, but I DON'T want them to become my drooling little groupies who think about me when they get up and eat breakfast and are still thinking about me when they get under the covers at night... it seems like their obsessions sap their personality. What I was wondering was whether or not you knew a SPECIFIC BEHAVIOR or trait that i may be amplifying that causes women to react this way... I want to TONE DOWN whatever it is that's getting them to drop their religion and worship me.. any help appreciated. by the way, i am NOT EVEN EXAGGERATING, i really do see myself as TOO sexy and its ANNOYING.. i want women to be challenging again! (P.S: while im not ugly, i sure as hell am not the type of guy that girls whisper and giggle about upon first glance... so don't attribute any of this to my looks)
Wow, another sad, sad story. Makes me weep.
Women chasing you around like groupies and acting like slaves... you poor thing.
Well, I do actually know what you're talking about. Here's the deal...
Most women are used to being in CONTROL of men. And when a guy like you shows up and uses his magical powers of COCKY AND FUNNY, they are taken off guard.
You are pressing the ATTRACTION button inside of a woman, which has an interesting side effect when done with Cocky and Funny:
IT MAKES THE WOMAN ACT LIKE A WUSSY!
This is a tough one for most guys to buy, but it's the absolute truth... and you know what I'm talking about.
When a woman realizes that she's not going to control you... and in fact, that she's feeling ATTRACTED to you and she doesn't know how to handle you, SHE'LL start getting nervous.
And in my experience, there are only a very FEW exceptional women out there in the world. I think that you just need to keep up the search. You'll find yourself a firecracker if that's what you're looking for.
I personally believe that it's important to understand this stuff NOT just because you can meet a lot of women using it...
I think that IT'S TOUGH TO FIND AN EXCEPTIONAL WOMAN these days, and you're probably going to have to date quite a few to find one. Knowing these techniques will help you see through tough exterior female personas, and start making you realize what you actually want in a woman.
You're on the right track, stick with it.
Hello, I do agree with the Cocky Funny in theory. However for me it is proving to be difficult in practice. One of the biggest hurdles for me seem to be the initial walkup. I am a very shy, nervous, and easily embarrassed person. Often when I see a beautiful women my heart starts to thump and my hands sweat, and face goes red. I have had 2 opportunities in the past few weeks where I had women come up to me to ask me for something, once for directions, and once for a light. I can think of a few things after these happened, like I could have told the girl asking for a lighter "those things are bad for you, you know" The girl asking for directions was a golden opportunity missed, I could have been more detailed and then got her email, but instead I just kind of froze up and gave her quick instructions. When this happens I start to get regrets and beat myself up for not thinking more on my toes.
I do think that places outside of nightclubs are good, because women don't expect it, and you catch them off guard, but I was on the tub this morning (subway in the USA) and saw this absolutely stunning Brazilian, I thought perhaps I could do the "are you single, my friend would like you" but all the people around me made me hesitate and put it off. If I had done it right at the beginning instead of oogling her in disbelief I probably could of done it.
For me at this point, just to make an attempt would be good to give me a boost. I realize I have become such a wuss. How do I get out of this nervous rut which keeps me from going for the women of my dreams.
J.P in London
If it freaks you out too much to approach women in public, then figure out how to meet them in other ways.
Get online and start instant messaging women...
Go to a pottery or yoga class (if those things interest you)...
Get a part-time job as a bartender.
Take dance lessons.
By the way, one of the best things you can do is get together with a friend, and go out for a day and meet 50 women. Just approach every single woman you see and use one of the techniques you've learned.
Then go do it again.
You might get sick the first 5 times, depending on how deeply-rooted your fears are, but this will help you get over it.
Part of the problem is that you don't know what to expect. It sounds to me like you really don't know how women will respond to you.
By approaching a lot of women one day, you'll find out that women are usually pretty nice, and you'll be able to handle whatever happens.
Otherwise, use one of the ideas I gave you above to make meeting women easier. It might be a good place to start.
I'll keep it short but first want to echo the feelings of everyone else on this e-mail by thanking you, your advice is seriously changing my life. Your stuff is great for people you've just met or that don't know you to well. However, I've just got back in contact with a girl I used to work with 8 months ago. We got on great and regularly went for coffee on our lunch breaks, so knew each other well. The only problem was that at the time she was in a relationship, so I had to fight the attraction I felt towards her. I have now found out that this has recently finished and want to make a move on her in the near future before someone else snaps her up. I've been 'cocky and funny' with her since we met, so that approach may be less effective than usual. Can you please give me some tips in how to take this further than just friendship.
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