In this stage, you will:
1) Interview her in the context of romantic units of interaction called "dates"
2) See if she matches your criteria for your goal
3) From here on out be attentive and prepared to decide where and how far to go with each woman you meet.
Beware of "Dating"
I've used the term "dating" pretty loosely so far, and I think it demands a bit of clarification. I realize that most men out there are used to the term and process of "dating." The typical date is where you ask a girl out to dinner and a movie.
I'd like you to start changing your approach. Stop "dating." Instead, get her to meet you at places where you can show her an interesting and unique time. Traditional dating is a sabotaging pattern. When you "ask a girl out," you are starting a mechanism in her mind that says: "Oh, he's attracted to me, and he wants to see if I'm a girlfriend/relationship/sex possibility." It's a familiar dance step, and she knows all the moves.
What you must do is break from this mold. You are no longer looking to "date" in the traditional sense. You are out there to excite women. Your premise is going to change, and you must make this apparent to the women that you want to rendezvous with. When you ask a girl out on a date, you trigger a whole set of defense mechanisms in her, and she will line them up for you like an obstacle course. You want a short cut around them.
Here's what to do:
Your first meeting is always an interview, a sort of get-to-know-you session. The meetings you have with her after that are always set with an unspoken agreement that you want to go out and have fun with her. Steer clear of these "traditional" date activities:
- Dinner at a restaurant - Shows no imagination, leaves you with a big bill and her wondering if you paid just to obligate her to a kiss. Too much weirdness.
- Movies - No interaction, no imagination, and if the movie is bad it ends up reflecting on you.
- Drinks at a bar - Too much of a singles scene, leaves you with the bill again, and only good as a starting off point.
What you must do is come up with mini-adventures. Your job is to create an interesting experience that she is interested in joining in with you. Some examples of meetings after the first rendezvous:
- Games - take her to a miniature golf course, or a pool hall, or an arcade.
- Local Shops - find a strip of unusual stores to take her to. Underground CD shops are great because they have an interesting culture, plus there is a lot of stuff to browse through.
- Flea markets, bazaars, or fairs - These are also interesting as they offer some interesting things to browse and buy.
- Cooking demonstration - there are a lot of stores now that offer cooking classes or demos.
- Any places with a strange or dramatic background - castles, old houses, ruins. There was a place near where I lived growing up called White Lady's Castle, where a ghost reportedly walked the grounds. Oddly, that's where many of the teenagers went to have a little action.
- The Photo Shoot - Get a digital camera (or a real one, if that's all you have available) and go out for a little experimental photography. This plays on her vanity, flattering her and making her feel important and beautiful that you'd want to have her as a subject. Trust me, you don't even have to be very good at taking pictures. (Hell, you don't even have to have film in the thing.) Just have fun.
You are striving to reduce the costs of meeting and seeing women, while at the same time making these "dates" more alluring and exciting. Save the candle-lit dinners for later. The more imagination you can show now, the more you will increase her attraction early on. There's plenty of time for hard romance when she's really attracted to you.
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