Avoid These Touches

Understand that women are very sensitive to touch, and touch is almost never neutral; it will either have a positive or negative affect. Some touching is almost universally bad. It mostly depends on how long you've known the woman, and what kind of precedent you have set with respect to touching. If you've just met her, hold back for a while until you know what kind of woman she is.

Don't ever touch private or intimate parts of the target's body until you have received definite evidence that she wants you to go there. Stay away from her butt, her breasts, her legs, her stomach, until much later. You see, women are not used to men having self-control around touch, and as a result you will stand out if you can demonstrate this to her. As your seduction moves forward, however, it will be up to you to initiate more and more physical contact - with discretion. I'll talk more about this in a later section.

I know that this may come as a shock to you, but punching her on the arm, pinching, or any kind of physically unpleasant contact is a definite NO-NO. Playground antics were cute when you were seven, but now it's time to grow up. Understand that a woman's first and overriding concern is whether or not you are safe - physically safe -and you must be sensitive to this. Don't ever touch her in a way that might be painful or that would jeopardize how secure she feels around you.

In general, when you first meet with her, whether it's over coffee or at a dance club, show some restraint at the early part. Don't start right in pawing at her and touching her. Let's put it this way, it's better to hold back too much at first than to show physical attention too soon or inappropriately. If you've just been introduced in a large group, you might go for a quick hug, but you're better off just giving her a wink and a nod and looking away quickly. Balance your distance with a measured amount of flirtatious behavior, just enough so she doesn't think you're a cold fish. At the same time, don't come on too strong. I advise men to wait until she's touched you the first time, because at this point, she's probably interested. If you touch her too soon, you can't be sure. But when time is limited, you will probably just have to move forward on your own best understanding.

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