Conversational Bridging

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In conversational bridging, you learn how to move from topic to topic, never being afraid that the conversation will fall into one of those deadly "uncomfortable silences." This is how this skill works.

Let's say you've just introduced yourself to Pam at a bar during happy hour. You've managed to start off the conversation with something that she responds to, and now you're not quite sure where to go. The concept of bridging is that you find something in the last thing she said to trigger your next question. (Remember, you're the one always asking questions.) So let's say that the conversation started like this:

You: "I don't usually come here at the end of the week. It just gets too crowded here."

Pam: "Yeah, I know what you mean. There's also too many drunk guys by the end of the night, too."

You: "Do you have a lot of problems with the drunk guys? Do you end up in Tequila drinking contests with them or something?"

Pam: "Ha-ha! No, I don't have any problems with them. Only when they start getting really obnoxious."

You: "What have they done that's obnoxious?"

Pam: "Oh, you wouldn't believe it. I was in here last week with my friend, Melody, and this big fat guy comes over and ..."

And it could go on like this for quite a while. You use her last statement to feed your next question. As you talk, you'll find yourself passing by other topic opportunities because you might want to stay on this one. Just store that away for the next chance you get, so that you have some "conversation in reserve."

You see most guys panic because they're afraid of running out of things to say. Then, when there's a lull in the conversation where they probably could say just about anything, they focus on the fact that they aren't able to think of anything, and how blank their mind is, and how loud this silence is, and how much longer can it go on without saying anything .

Really, your fear of talking to women is just performance anxiety created by your own worries. If you learn this one simple trick, you'll never feel at a loss for words. You'll always be able to bridge from topic to topic with ease.

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