Your Home

Your house or apartment should be ready for you to bring a woman over. Some of the necessities are:

■ Keep your house clean and functional

■ Put all your dirty clothes out of sight.

■ Keep your bathroom clean. Make sure the toilet, sink, and shower are working and clean.

■ Fix any broken doors or windows

■ Keep your kitchen clean. Clean out the refrigerator of old food.

■ Check your house for odors and use a deodorizer if necessary

■ Hide your pornos, pictures of ex-girlfriends, Swedish erotica, penis enlargement pumps, and all the other stuff that you think might give her reason to think, "Uh-oh."

■ Watch out for "Leave-behinds" - those little mementos that a woman will 'forget' at your house to give her an excuse to come back later. Usually, they just serve as a major obstacle to your next overnight guest. Find these items and terminate them with extreme prejudice. (One gal I was with discovered a pair of earrings in my car door. Very uncomfortable.)

■ Get any weird stuff out from under your bathroom sink or from your medicine cabinet. She will really wonder about you if the only items under your sink are a box of latex gloves, Vaseline, and a strap-on dildo.

■ Keep your house sensual. Lots of things to touch and stimulate her mind and body.

■ Buy some fruit and chocolate, or other desserts or intimate food. Part of the progression in the Method we're about to cover relies on your ability to submerge her in an alternate reality where she feels safe and indulgent. Sweets and exciting foods help build that atmosphere.

■ Candles: Have lots of candles around to light your house. Also, all the lights in your apartment or house should have dimmer switches so that you don't have to struggle with either too much or too little light. Plan your lighting out well in advance to create the mood you want.

■ Arrange your furniture to make it pleasant and organized. I advise getting a book on Feng Shui, part of the Asian philosophy of nature that concerns itself with living in harmony with your environment. You'll impress a woman that finds out that you put this kind of thought into your home.

■ Get a wind chime. You'd be amazed how many women respond to them. They create a delicate random music that is very romantic and soothing.

■ Plan out seductive music and have it ready in advance. If you're a tech geek, you've probably downloaded a hundred MP3s of Metallica and Limp Bizkit, but you need to get a few seductive tunes ready, too. Some suggestions:

o Sade o Enigma o Diana Krall o Any old jazz or blues o Any good R&B, like Janet Jackson, Toni Braxton, etc. o Tangerine Dream o Slow, seductive classical music (but be careful, because this can often come across like a cliché. You don't want her to burst into laughter when you put on a sonata and walk over to her in your genuine Hugh Hefner Playboy robe, complete with pipe.)

o Some music to avoid:

■ Any loud, obnoxious classical music

■ Any rap, techno, or electronic music

If you have the ability to play MP3s, setup a long list of songs in advance, or if you only have CDs, get a multi-disc changer so you don't have to keep getting up to refresh the music.

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