Alpha Exercise 6 Pausing Pacing

There's a Zen saying that it's not the notes that make music - it's the space in between them. It's not the bars that make a prison, it's the space between them.

It's the same thing with your speech. Proper pacing is essential. You want to speak slowly when you're talking with women. 1) Because you'll seem more thoughtful and introspective, 2) You'll seem more in control, 3) You'll seem like you're not in a hurry or anxious/nervous.

It really is easy to get excited when you talk to women. You get this surge of energy just from interacting with a good-looking babe. Your heart speeds up. Your breathing becomes shorter. You find yourself licking your lips and your mouth drying out. You have to get over this performance anxiety and relax to be effective.

Get out a book or magazine with a few paragraphs that you can read aloud. As you read them, try to find the places where pauses work, and stick them in. Maybe even make an emphasis with your hands. Then, also figure out where the best places are to speed up for a second, then slow back down. Repeat these paragraphs several times, until you can read them so convincingly that someone would swear you were making it up on the fly.

Use this technique when you're with a woman and you want to impress her with your ability to present yourself. Inserting pauses is a way of building dramatic tension in your words, and all great speeches have used it.

(Go online and search for an audio clip of Winston Churchill's famous speech to the British about "We shall fight them on the beaches." Listen to the way he uses pauses in this great speech. Listen to speeches by Martin Luther King, Jr. In fact, listen to any great speaker and you'll get tons of examples of this.)

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