Picking out the Good Ones

The process of getting that first email to eventually lead to a first date is a long and tricky one. Your initial emails should focus on getting to know one another better: ask questions about hobbies, career, family, musical preferences, political affiliations, religion ... anything but past relationships goes!

There's no set pattern to online relationships. You may just start emailing casually, then find you have more in common later down the line. Or, your initial attraction may be so strong that you email one another daily.

The good thing about online dating is that you decide whether you're compatible based on conversation and common interests rather than physical appearance. Online daters often establish a friendship and learn to sustain a conversation before they meet in person. Many people find it easier to share personal details and express their inner thoughts with the anonymity of the internet, so it may feel as if you're truly getting to know one another faster than you ever would in real life.

However, this sense is often an illusion. The anonymity of the internet also hides true intentions and identities. You may feel as if you and your online interest really connect, but unless you meet face to face, you're missing out on a crucial part of the person herself.


Many guys find that women they've clicked with over the net are nothing like what they imagined in person. That blonde who exudes wit and charm in her emails is tongue-tied and distant in person. That's because email and face-to-face conversations are completely different, and there's no guarantee that a person who is good at one will be good at the other. Too, she may have expected someone different than the person standing in front of her. It's easy to build a fantasy in your head of the other person when all you've had is online contact.

If you feel quite strongly about someone, it's best to meet sooner rather than later. Otherwise, you may build up your expectations quite high and be crushed when the other person doesn't fulfill them. The face-to-face meeting is the clincher for an online romance: either the chemistry is there ... or it isn't. And I hate to say that, in the majority of cases, it simply isn't. But that's the gamble of online dating. You won't know until you meet!

Kickass Dating Conversation

Kickass Dating Conversation

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