Looking beyond Mr or Miss Perfect

Nothing is as futile, demoralising, or limiting to your flirting agenda as having a fixed idea of how your perfect partner should be. Watching someone saving themselves exclusively for a person they've never met but who's 'fabulous looking, "x" feet tall, earns £x, has never been married, and is the life and soul of the party', is very sad. Finding Mr or Miss Goodenough is easier and more likely, especially if they too have a more forgiving list of attributes they're hoping to find in a mate.

Keeping an open mind allows you access to the biggest pool of potential flirtations. Ask your friends who're happily dating if their partners met their idea of 'perfect' when they first met them. You'll be surprised by how many people initially didn't even consider their current partner a dating option.

Keeping a list of undesirable features you wish to avoid (for example, smoking, being selfish, or wanting to see more than one person) is preferable to one of must haves when choosing people to flirt with. Just remember to keep your list short.

eh Rejecting the advances of someone without giving them a fair chance is a big mistake. Even if they're not your 'type', they've ( Hm j plucked up the courage to approach you and you should at least give them a short hearing - unless they're very drunk or objectionable!

If you give someone a fair chance and you're still not interested, keep your responses friendly rather than flirtatious so they don't get the wrong end of the stick. See Chapter 11 for more tips on handling this tricky situation. And if they still don't get the message, you can find ways to discreetly decline the advances of a clinger-on in Chapter 18.

Continue reading here: Adopting the right flirting attitude

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