Preparing to Seduce

In the courtship process, just after flirting, but just before sex, comes seduction. Although this book is essentially about flirting, sometimes you can find yourself zipping past it into the realms of seduction, so having the heads up on preparing to seduce is a good move. For more information about getting the sex angle spot on, check out Dr Ruth Westheimer and Pierre Lehu's Sex For Dummies (Wiley).

Melting with anticipation

Anticipation is seduction's most vital ingredient. Think back to the strength of your desire for Christmas when you were a child, when you knew that Santa was coming with lots of presents. As an adult you still look forward to receiving presents but not to the same degree. Often the anticipation is better than what you actually get!

Visualisation can be a great aid to anticipation. Imagine where you're going with your date, how good they're going to look and smell, how they'll feel to touch, and how much you're going to enjoy each other's company.

To build your anticipation and theirs, try the following:

✓ Think about how much you're looking forward to seeing your date and how exciting being near them will be.

✓ Send a text telling them why you can't wait to see them and describing what you anticipate happening when you meet.

Making a chemical connection

As well as being physically attracted to someone, if you're also chemically compatible the relationship can ascend dizzying heights. You can enhance this connection with your pheromones, the sex hormones released from the armpit and groin area. Pheromones are odourless chemical messengers secreted by animals and humans that the nose picks up at a subconscious level, telling the other person that you're sexually attracted to them.

Discreetly moisten your lips a little before kissing to give your chemical connection a boost. The first kiss has a special purpose. When you're attracted to someone the glands in your mouth and the corners of your lips release semiochemicals - the collective name for a number of chemical messages which can facilitate everything from fight or flight to attract or repel responses, and which stimulate sexual desire. People lick their lips not only for auto-erotic purposes but also to prepare the ground for their kissing chemical connections. If the kiss is electric, not only are they a great kisser but you're chemically suited, too.

Being brazen

Being brazen means using your clothes and your attitude to maximise your air of confidence and readiness. At the point where you're past flirting and have seduction on your mind, start to physically reveal more of yourself. Tauten your body posture so that you're showing yourself in your best and most sexy light, and look them right in the eye. When they can see that you so obviously want them, they'll be driven wild with anticipation.

Loosen your shirt, or raise your hemline a little, sit with your legs parted and your chest out, and look them in the eye whilst gently touching yourself, as shown in Figure 13-1.

Figure 13-1: Being brazen.

Continue reading here: Becoming Intimate

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